I've got to stop.

I'm really set in my ways.
I mean, I don't mind change at all. Let's face it:  I've moved more than a lot of people should in their lifetime and I enjoyed it every time.
But if you're going to tell me that something (like say, who you're cast with in a show) is going to be one way and I get used to the idea, don't turn around and tell me that it's changing.
I have my opinions.
Maybe I shouldn't share them.
But hey? Who's going to be reading this anyway, right?

There are two Marguerite's and two Percy's in our production of The Scarlet Pimpernel. I am one of the Marguerite's (but let's face it, I don't think I would have turned down Percy, either!). Anyway, we've had two weeks of rehearsals and we still hadn't heard who we were going to be paired up with. We've been trading back and forth with each rehearsal to give the directors an idea of how we work with each other. I'm going to be honest:  I am a singer, first and foremost. I sing, I learn lines, I learn my part, then I act. Acting, for some reason when there is no music underneath me, is really hard for me. So, of course switching Percy's every other day has been a task. Obviously a good one because, hey, I'm not a great actress! But learning to listen is something every performer should know how to do.

Moving on. I've asked the director on a couple of occasions (which looking back on it, I probably shouldn't have but again, I'm terrible and I'm set in my ways) if he knew who we'd be with. He told me both times the same Percy's name. One of those times, the other leads heard him. Naturally, we gravitated that way and would practice in those pairs more than not. Probably not the best choice, but we did it.

Just the other day, he mentioned that because of extenuating circumstances, we would probably be switching.

What?

Did I not just say that I'm set in my ways? Have I not been freaking out for the past two weeks because I'm not that strong of an actress? The Percy that I was supposed to be with has a very similar singing and acting style that I do. The other Marguerite and Percy are the same way:  acting and singing styles blend very well. And now he's going to switch it up?! Ah! I felt really comfortable and now I'm being taken out of my comfort zone.

Not that I don't think the show still won't be amazing. I will just have to adjust. But I'm afraid I'll hold back because of how different the other Percy is to my style of performing.

I don't know why this is bothering me so much, but it is.