I'm supposed to be grocery shopping

But instead I'm blogging.... It's a good thing Wal Mart is open 24 hours...

Anyway, yesterday was Father's day.

I feel like it should been like "Priesthood Appreciation Day"

I love my husband.

My 21st birthday gift - Mary Poppins!

I'm just so grateful to have him in my life.

He's my best friend.

He's a wonderful example.

He's an amazing friend.

He's a talented film maker.

He's a gifted singer.

He's one of the most driven people I've ever met.

He's a very uplifting person.

He has a relationship with our Father in Heaven.

He has a testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

He is my saving grace, my best friend. The father of our future children (no, I'm not pregnant).

Anyway, happy father's day to my wonderful husband. 

I love you most.

Day 22 – Something that upsets you

WARNING: THIS POST IS A LITTLE GRAPHIC. IF YOU HAVE A WEAK STOMACH, I SUGGEST SKIPPING THIS ONE... Love, Kelsey

I had my first REAL experience with this thing last night.
I didn't get any sleep.
That's not what I'm going to blog about, but that does upset me.

What I am going to tell you about is how my husband was dog sick.

It was about 6:30 when I got the text from my husband telling me that he had vomited twice. I got a little worried, of course, but it was just my luck that I ended up not getting home until an hour later :( He was laying on the couch, writhing. I got him some crackers, some Sprite, a bottle of Gatorade, and applesauce... He then continued to vomit almost an average of 3x an hour after that.
I called our friend Eliot twice in a frenzy, hoping he could come and give a blessing to him. I tried contacting our home teachers and friends from our ward, but they either didn't answer or I didn't have a phone number for them. I paced and paced. Then at about 10:30, Bryan said he wanted to try and go to sleep.
We said prayers together, then got into bed.
I couldn't fall asleep. Or, I guess, I wouldn't let myself fall asleep. I read a little, texted my mom, and waited--hoping that Eliot would call back.
After an hour, my phone rang.
"What's going on?" Eliot said into the phone. He knew something had to be wrong.
I told him what had happened and asked him to come give a priesthood blessing to Bryan. He said he would, and showed up with a friend to help administer at about 10 after midnight.
I had been bawling. Bryan had been vomiting more. I think he was up to 15 times when Eliot got there. The blessing he gave was simple, and I prayed as I sat and listened to the words said.
After they were finished, Eliot looked at me and asked if I needed one.
I did.
So, as he began to speak, I wouldn't let myself calm. But the Spirit told me to relax and listen to what he was saying. He told me that this would pass. That my love for my husband was strong. That I needed to be patient and understand the healing power of the atonement at this time. It was exactly what I needed to hear.
Eliot and Devin left.
We tried, going to sleep, but the night wasn't over yet.
After that, every hour at 10 til the hour, Bryan was in the bathroom.

What am I trying to get at?

What upset me is that my husband was suffering.
And there was nothing I could do about it.

I've felt this feeling before, but never to this degree do I recall ever feeling this much. I was scared. I was angry. All I could do was sit and watch and console, but not comfort.

It was hard. I'm just glad he was able to get some sleep this morning. Now I have to manage to find the energy to get through work today.

And now... we wait

I finished my BYU application. I got accepted to UVU on Monday, but as an out-of-state student. Apparently, I have to have my license and be a registered voter for at least 3 months.
I'll be making phone calls, come April. I'm not paying that much for tuition. That's a little absurd. Especially since I am technically a resident of Utah, but the school just makes you do more crap to qualify. I mean, I've lived here for over a year and I'm married to a resident. And, as a matter of fact, I have proof of BOTH of those--WHO KNEW?!
Ugh. But, it will be done soon enough. Just got to wait it out for a bit.
I think waiting on BYU for a fourth time, though, is going to be the death of me. I know that I want an education. It has been a goal of mine since I decided that I was going to college to actually FINISH with a Bachelor's degree. But, now that I'm here and now that I've seen how much my husband (quite frankly) despises this school... I don't know if I belong there. If anything, I could give it a try for a semester or 2 and then see if I want to leave.
But then again, I have a different personality than my sweet hubby does. I will probably love it.
Maybe.
It's just not exactly right for him.

Know what else we have to wait for? Moving.
Yes, we're pretty set on moving if I don't get into BYU. The apartment we've been looking at is pretty awesome. And it's right down the street from UVU, behind Wal-Mart, and is closer to my work with less crazy hills which means...! I get to ride my bike to work more often :) YAY FOR EXERCISE!

Know what else we have to wait on? Kids.
I had the strangest dream the other night. The only thing I can really remember from that dream is that Bryan and I were in a room together and he was angry at me. He was saying things like, "What are we going to do?!" and "It's too soon!" and "You lied to me!" Then, I lifted up my shirt and said, "Well, I can't really hide it anymore." I'm guessing that in the dream, I was about 16-20 weeks along because I had a nice little baby-bump.
The sad part is, when I woke up... I was so depressed that it wasn't real. That's the first time I've really felt "baby hungry." At that moment, and for a few minutes after, I wanted to be a mom.
I mean, I joke around with Bryan a lot. I'll tease him whenever babies come on the tv or whenever we see cute little kids running around at the store or when there's a baby blessed at church... But that moment was the first REAL moment that I've had where I just wanted a baby.
Weird.

Know what else we have to wait for? Bryan's W2's
We're worried that his old employers won't get them to us because of one's reputation for being late with EVERYTHING (including pay), and the other not having our new address. **sigh** Hopefully we get it...

I'm done for now.

Life is beautiful :)

There have been a few lessons that I have learned lately.

Lesson #1: ALWAYS look at the bright side.
The first few weeks of the month really weighed down on me. I just felt so... blah. I felt like my life wasn't going to go anywhere. Everyday I would go from project to project, work to home, home to work, church and back, and that was it. It was monotonous. And if you know me, I am NOT particularly the person that enjoys routine. Yes, it is good in some areas of life, but not in all areas. I mean, where's the adventure in that?!
Anyway, it wasn't until I was sitting with my sweet fiance telling him that his life DOESN'T suck and that he really CAN enjoy his job if he changes his attitude that I realized... That's what I needed to change my attitude, too. It was so simple! I just needed to see it somewhere else before I could see how it could change my own life. So, I did just that. I started praying for my co-workers and my boss and for the environment that we could create at work. And, honestly, I am really starting to enjoy my job like I used to! It's amazing what a little change of mind can do for your life!

Lesson #2: NEVER hesitate to talk.
I misunderstood something my sweet fiance and I had briefly talked about while we were dating and it has been nagging at me since we got engaged. My sweet fiance and I talked it out and he told me that he never knew I that I felt that way about the whole situation. I realized again how truly blessed I am to have him. We talked everything out and we are more open about our feelings, what's going through our heads, and even how we communicate.

Lesson #3: ALWAYS trust in God; he'll find a way.
"He'll Make a Way" by Byron J. Smith says it best :)

I know the Lord will make a way!
I know the Lord will make a way! Oh, yes!
If you trust and never doubt, he will bring you out!
I know the Lord will make--
I know the Lord will make--
I know! I know! I know! The Lord will make a way!
(repeat)

Amazing grace! How sweet the sound
that saved a soul like me!
His mercy everlasting, his truth endures,
And he sent his son to set me free!
(Repeat first verse)

He's there and He cares for me!
He cares, and He'll set you free!
Trust and never doubt, He will bring you out!
I know the Lord will make--
I know the Lord will make--
I know! I know! I know! The Lord will make a way!

Make a way! Make a way! Lord, make a way!
Make a way! I know he'll-- (repeat)

[vamp:]
Altos 1st - Swing down chariot, God will make a way!
Basses 2nd - My Lord, what a mornin', He'll make a way!
Tenors 3rd - I know my Lord will make a way for you!
Sopranos 4th - Trust in Him, He'll show you the way!

Make a way! Make a way! Lord, make a way!
Make a way! Have mercy! (repeat)

I know the Lord will make--
I know the Lord will make--
I know! I know! I know! The Lord will make a way!